Sole man

I couldn't sleep last night, so I tried counting shoes.

I mentally totted up the footwear I own. (Hey! It was late, and I was willing to try any silly bollocks to get some kip.)

For a fat, ugly bastard with no fashion sense, I sure gotta lotta sole:

• Trainers - 10 pairs
• Flip-flops - 4 pairs
• Smart shoes - 3 pairs
• Chelsea boots - 2 pairs
• Sandals - 2 pairs
• Worker boots - 1 pair
• Running shoes - 1 pair
• Wellies - 1 pair
  

Total - 24 pairs. (No, I don't feel like a girl.)